The Top 20 Actresses Who Should Have Been Nude in Horror Movies, Pt.1: 20-11

We all love seeing beautiful actresses getting nude in movies. We horror fans know that our beloved genre many times does give us the skin we need. Sadly, for whatever reason, there are always babes that we look at in a film and are like, "Damn! Why did she not show the goods?" This is the list of the babes we all wanted to see naked the most.

20. Ashley Laurence in Hellraiser I, II, and Hallraiser: Hellseeker- One of the most beautiful heroines in the history of the genre, Ashley, in the role of Kristy Cotton, has encountered Pinhead and the Cenobites three times, and yet she never let us see her nude. Terrible! A travesty, I say!



19. Sienna Guillory in Resident Evil: Apocalypse- She played Jill Valentine, an actual character from the video games. And, she looked damn fucking good doing it. She is just as hot, if not, in fact, hotter than series lead, Milla Jovovich, who has been fully nude in the series. But, yet Ms. Guillory is not. She returns for this year's installment. Will she show us some skin? I would love if she did, but my guess is no.




18. Tracy Griffith in The First Power and Sleepaway Camp III: Teenage Wasteland- Melanie's infinitely hotter half-sister has been in two horror flicks. And, yet she did not get nude in either or. In The First Power she, along with Lou Diamond Phillips, battled a Satan worshiper bestowed with the ability to possesses anybody by the Prince of Darkness, himself. You know with her bare and skin and Diamond's ass kicking abilities Satan would have not stood a chance! As, for the third Sleepaway Camp movie, I realize that slasher final babes do not bare skin. But, they should! And, she should have here!



17. Ona Grauer in House of the Dead- Yes, HOTD is pretty fucking stupid, but I do find that in it's stupidness it does have that it's so bad so good kind of charm. But, even if you hate it, you most admit that it has plenty of gore and babes. Some of them nude! But, one of the hottest ones, Ms. Grauer, ain't. We do get to see her run in slow motion and jiggle a lot. But, we want more! We demand more! She does, after all, have a great rack, that needs to be exposed! Shit, look. Even the film's villain wants to see them, in this pic. Clearly evil members of the living dead have great taste in women!



16. Lindsay Lohan in I Know Who Killed Me- You know out of all the entries this one was one of the ones that pisses me off the most. Why? Well, cause this film is fucking godawful, that I can't believe that I somehow made it through it all! Ms. Lohan played a stripper in this one. Which you would think hey, she is gonna get nude. Nope. She don't. Which makes seeing this even more pointless. I am not fan of hers. In fact, I can't even stand her, but I, up and until this point, thought that she looked great. She don't looks as hot, now. So, I think I she totally lost the chance for us to see the goods she has in her prime. Epic fail on every fucking level.


15. Shawnee Smith in The Blob and the Saw Franchise- The Blob is the movie where I developed my Shawnee Smith crush. She is easily one of the hottest cheerleaders in the history of cinema. On top of being beautiful, she kicks some major fucking ass in it. Come on, she would have been a nude cheerleader! Her return to big screen terror was the Saw franchise. And, she still looked amazing! But, she didn't get nude in those either! Come on, Shawnee, you are breaking the hearts, of us, your fans!


14. Fairuza Balk in The Craft- OK, I totally enjoyed this movie and its' beautiful female cast. But, as hot as the other three girls were, Balk is my fav. That hot body and those gorgeous eyes! I freaking love goth girls, and, in this movie, she was one of the hottest, ever! And, while she cast a spell on me and many other dudes, had she taken off her clothes our heads might have exploded, Scanners style! Though, the other head would prob have made an explosion of its' own!

13. Rose McGowan in Scream- I fucking love this babe, in particular in this movie. She looked amazing in that tight sweater. Yet, she did not get naked. Worst part? She dies anyway. So, in following slasher tradition, she should have. But, wait this is the 90s, and this is the film that started a terrible trend in slasher flicks of chicks not getting nude. Fuck that! Truly makes you wanna kick Kevin Williamson in his nutsack.


12. Katie Featherston in Paranormal Activity- Paranormal Activity had little in the way of special FX. But, the best FX were the lovely Ms. Featherston's God-given boobies and big ass. Sadly, we never got to see them. This curvalious babe could have used her T&A to distract the evil demon haunting her. Distracted the Ghostbusters could have come in and trapped it! See, I just came up with an awesome idea for a cross-over film!



11. Chiaki Kuriyama in Hair Extensions- The Battle Royale and Kill Bill Vol. 1 babe is always yummy, but she looks her hottest in the J-horror flick, Hair Extensions. It's a good, original scare flick, with lots of hotties. Kuriyama looks absolutely breathtaking, in it. But, sadly she remains clothed. Why? No seriously, why?! Had she been nude surely that scene would have gone down in horror nudie history!!

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How to Celebrate the 4th of July, Master Style

It's Independence Day and aside from the all BBQs, booze, and fireworks; I would like to recommend some other awesome things you could thrown in for the celebration!

Let's begin with cartoons. And, they don't get more appropriate then G.I. Joe. It was one of the most beloved toons of the 80s, and one of the best action figures of all time. Even better are the excellent comics or the the more mature toon G.I. Joe: Resolute, which actually had people getting killed! And, it let the Joes use guns instead of laser weapons. Avoid the terrible G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra, unless you are into seeing your childhood memories be raped.

Speaking of movies, I say go with the Rambo movies. I would go with the first, second, and/ or forth one. It's always fun to see Stallone kick the baddies asses! Horror fans, please avoid seeing Uncle Sam. It's a terrible movie, and you're way better off wallowing in the ultra-violence of Rambo. Hard to believe Uncle Sam was made by William Lusting, he of Maniac, Maniac Cop Trilogy, and Vigilante fame. Then again, he did make Maniac Cop 3... You can always watch American Psycho or An American Haunting, of course. Those are actually good movies.

Perhaps you are in the mood to see guys beat the shit out of each other. In which case I say go with pro-wrestling. I would say sticking with Hulk Hogan (only as a babyface [ good guy]) and/ or Kurt Angle (as a heel [bad guy] or babyface) matches. Or, better yet the awesome matches that they had in WWE. The Real American vs. the American Hero, what the fuck more could you ask for?

Now, of course, you might need some reading material. I would go with some Captain America comics. I been a fan of Capt. since I was a kid. He remains one of my favorite heroes in the Marvel Universe. You can always delight as he battles scumbags like the Red Skull or even terrorist pieces of shit, as he did, for a while, post 9-11. I am looking forward to seeing the Capt. movie. But, I hope they do it right. Avoid at all costs ANY of the old Captain America movies, including the 90s one with the Italian (?!) Red Skull! Seriosuly, what the fuck were they thinking with that one?!

What about some tunes, now? Well, you can go with such great feeling music like: The Misfits- American Psycho, Marilyn Manson- Portrait of an American Family, Rob Zombie- American Made Music to Strip by, or GWAR- America Must be Destroyed!

Now of course, there is nothing more American than porn! So, I would definitely recommend some smut, too. Then again, in my book, any time is always a great time to enjoy pornography! This Hustler cover proves my point, does it not? Maybe, I could also recommend you popping in American Daydreams, Vol. 4?

You should also have a party and tell all the hot girls coming that they must wear bikinis with Old Glory on them. T&A and the Red, White, and Blue. What's more American than that?

Anyways, I just want to wish you all a Happy 4th of July! Have lots of fun and stay safe!And, getting back to the whole porno thing, I would like to say that one of the hottest MILFs, in the history of the world, and one of this blog's most popular babes to talk about, Vicky Vette, wants, to wish you a Happy Independence Day, too! Definitely, makes you stand in attention, does it, not?

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