Horror Viewings for October 2012

As is the tradition for this blog and me, it's time to talk about all the movies, I've watched so far this month (and I really try to only watch horror movies in Oct). As always, I do it in hopes of helping you pick some good horror flicks to watch in this, THE greatest time of the year! So let's get this started already!

All reviews are out of 4 stars.

Emaunelle and the Last Cannibals- My favorite Joe D'Amato flick and my fav Laura Gemser flick, I revisited this fun mix of softcore erotica and cannibalistic horror after doing a write up for Best-Horror-Movies.com on the best exploitation horror flicks. Lesbians, babes, cannibalism, gore, full frontal female nudity, sex, and hairy bushes, what more do you need? ***1/2

Mark of the Vampire- Todd Browning directs Bela Lugosi as a vampire in this mystery/ horror flick. Great atmosphere and sets, but the ending is fucking AWFUL and a total letdown. It ruins the whole thing. Shame. **








Frankensweenie- This touching, funny, and loving tribute to classic horror is one of Burtonn's very best. I laugh and I cried in this wonderful tale of a little boy whose cute doggie dies, and he resurrects it. The climax kicks major ass. Ranks among the best films of the year, so far! ***1/2

Black Death- From director Christopher (Severance) Smith comes this well acted, especially by Sean Bean, tale of witch-hunting, the bubonic plaque, and paganism. I think this makes for a very fine companion piece to the amazing Witchfinder General.***







Squirm- I been a fan of this one since I was a little kid. This killer worm flick is the best non-giant killer invertebrate flick ever! ***1/2







Frankenstein- The second best horror film of the golden age, this Karloff/ James Whales classic never fails to captivate. And, truth be you need to watch at least one Universal and/ or Hammer film during the Halloween season. ****








Maniac Cop- Since I will be dressed as Matt Cordell, the Maniac Cop himself, for my friend's wedding, I figured I would revisit this fun William Lustig action/ slasher flick. Bruce Campbell and Tom Atkins both add great genre support to tit. While the second film is the superior one, I don't own that one cause it's OOP (out of print), so I did my role research with this one. BTW, the tagline of this one (you can see it on the poster to the left), is a personal favorite of mine.**1/2




Paranormal Activity 4- I'm not sure what possessed (pun intended) me to see this in the movies, as I have only seen the first film. I liked said movie, but admit ably the whole found footage thing is something I'm fucking tired of. But, I think the appeal of Katie Featherston's amazing cleavage called me. I expected nothing, so I was pleasantly surprised when it turned out to be fun. A new family adopts creepy kid and shit goes bad for them. It's a got fun sense of humor and is actually pretty funny. There are tons of jump scares, some of which work, most of which don't. Still, it's much better than it really has any right to be. Of course, if you hate this series, this one won't change your thoughts or anything. But, with an open mind and no expectations you may like, too. ***

 
The Black Cat- This boundary pushing (for then) pre-Hayes Codes golden age horror flick has Karloff play a Satan worshiper and Lugosi in a rare turn as a hero. It's so fucking good! Both are top form. Karloff is chilling and there is genuine sympathy to be felt for Lugosi. The movie adds Satanic rituals and allusions to necrophilia, as well as a climatic off-screen skin flaying that ranks as one of the best moments in old school horror film history. A masterpiece that is my fav Lugosi flick, my fav non-Frankenstein Karloff, and my fav colab between them. ****

Anyway, I would love to know what horror movies you have been or plan to watch this season. I hope you all have a fun, spooky, and safe time.

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What Halloween Means to Me (From Son of Celluloid)

First off, I have spent Thurs- Sun at New York Comic Con. I was extremely busy with that. In the following weeks you will see the tons of pics I got, as well as the interviews with Tera Patrick, Adrianne Curry, and Linda "Vampy BitMe" Le. Anyway:

In continuing with this month's horror theme, I would like you to read the essay that I sent to Son of Celluloid's What Halloween Means to Me for bloggers to guest appear on. He's been featuring different ones, for last few days and mine was up recently. I wasn't able to post it earlier cause of the aforementioned NYCC. I've talked up Son of Celluloid before cause it really is one of my fav blogs. Nathan Hamilton, who's blog it is, is an awesome guy who loves metal, horror movies, and pro-wrestling. In other words his taste kicks ass! Anyway, here it is, hope you enjoy it, as it really came from my heart: http://sonofcelluloid1.blogspot.com/2012/10/what-halloween-means-to-me-day-6.html

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Horror Movie Viewings for October 2011

As has been a custom for the last two years, I will let you know the horror movies, I have watched so far this month of October. I always hope this will help you decide what to watch or not watch this month. And, as always I wanna know you have been watching. Anyway, here we go:

All ratings out of 4 stars

Friday the 13th Pt. 2- Jason takes center stage as the villain and takes vengeance for the death of his psycho mom at the end of the first and classic film. This enjoyable entry in the series is pretty much a typical slasher, but it's helped greatly by some good acting (best of which has to be Amy Steel as the final girl) and Jason looking ever so creepy in his sack head mask. The beginning is fucking great, too. Too bad the MPAA butchered it.
***


Poltergeist- Family moves into haunted house. Their little daughter gets kidnapped by the ghosts. They call for help to get her back into our world. Directed by Tobe Hooper and produced by Steven Spielberg (though some reports say Spielberg was behind the camera...), this is, to me, Hooper's second best film (TCM remains his masterpiece). It's exciting, scary, fun, and heartfelt. And, for those who think there can be such thing as good PG horror movie take a look at how amazing this classic is. That being said, this one has more shocking stuff than ANY PG or even PG-13 movie would ever dare have today. The FX by ILM are still cool, and Jo Beth Williams is a total MILF!! In all, it amounts to my fav haunted house film, ever. Oh yeah, one more thing. This movie looks and sounds AMAZING on blu-ray!!!!
****

House on the Edge of the Park- In honor of the passing of the great David Hess, I had to revisit this mean-spirited and nasty film from Cannibal Holocaust director Ruggero Deodato. For more of my thoughts on it read my Hess tribute here: http://themastergio.blogspot.com/2011/10/tribute-to-nicest-bad-guy-david-hess.html
***1/2



Experiment in Torture- I reviewed this godawful piece of shit here. I don't think I need to talk about this filth anymore...
1/2 (a star)






Alone with Her- A creeper uses hidden video camera to record, follow, and stalk a beautiful Latin woman (the gorgeous Ana Claudia Talancon) he has an obsession with. Easily one of the best found footage horror films, this creepy and disturbing horror/ thriller is sometimes underrated and overlooked. It gets under your skin and will seriously creep you out. I would imagine if you are a girl it is even more scary. The acting is excellent. Talancon is great and a very underrated actress. Plus, she is absolutely gorgeous!! Why is this woman not getting more roles? Oh yeah, she is also fully nude. Yum!!
***1/2

The Bride of Frankenstein- Dr. Frankenstein and the evil Dr. Preterious make a mate for the monster in THE finest horror film of the golden era. Beautifully shot by James Whales it is moving, funny, and scary. The acting is excellent and sets amazing. Truly one of the greatest movies in the history of cinema and a personal favorite of mine.
****



Devil- Five strangers are trapped in an elevator. One of them is Satan! Preposterous, stupid, and sanctimonious bullshit comes courtesy of M. Night Shymalan's script. And, yes there is a twist. One that is a real groaner. The ending is a high and mighty piece of fucking shit. The explanation as to why the hell Lucifer is doing this is so fucking stupid. Ugh, I could go and on. In short you will feel like you are in hell watching this horrid crap!
*1/2


Well, I hope you all have a safe and fun Halloween. And be sure to watch LOTS of horror flicks!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!

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The 10 Best Horror Remakes of All Time

This Friday one of my favorite vampire movies has a remake of it hit the theaters: Fright Night (Conan: The Barbarian also hits the movies, but while it's splatter it ain't horror, and I don't think of it as a direct remake). I am not very interested or excited about said movie since the trailer is less than underwhelming. But, I heard a good review or two. I'm not sure I will be seeing anytime soon (but I do wanna see Conan!).



That being said, remakes have been an annoying trend in the genre in the last couple of years. And, while many have been truly, truly rancid (One Missed Call, Psycho, The Fog, etc.) a couple have been been great. This list showcases the very best in the remake department.



10. House of Wax (2005)- This is an interesting remake in that it takes the Gothic setting and styling of the original Vincent Price classic and completely changes it for nasty slasher film territory. It's not a better movie, but is substantially different. There are a couple of memorable moments, include some tense torture scenes. The gorgeous Elisha Cuthbert also makes for a great final girl, one of the best of the 2000s for sure. Even Paris Hilton being in this does not hurt it one bit.









9. My Bloody Valentine 3D (2009)- Taking elements of the original (which really ranks as one of the best slashers of the 80s, moreso uncut) and adding its own take, this fun and wild gorefest is one of the most rip-roaring good times movie going experiences of the last few years. The cast and everyone involved seems to be having as much fun as we are watching it. It, more or less, kicked off the 3D trend, but unlike a lot of the recent shit out there, this one works excellently in 3D. Extra points for the DVD release being in 3D (and not that over-priced real 3D shit, either).





8. I Spit on Your Grave (2010)- This one had so much going against it. From the get go I did not think a remake to a nasty, grindhouse film like this could ever work today. But, it does, and surprisingly well at that. Sure it's slicker and lacks the grittiness of the original, but it does not lack the teeth. The humiliation/ rape is still prolonged and nasty. While, the revenge scenes are shocking and gruesome. Punches ain't pulled and the acting is solid, with villains coming off as utter filth and the stunning heroine earning our sympathy. The climax will have your jaw on the floor! Honestly this movie puts the Last House on the Left remake to fucking shame!





7. Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978)- This movie has been remade a total of four times!! The first three are solid films (the forth, er, not so much...), but, to me, this is the best take on the subject. The FX are flawless, the cast and acting excellent, and the directing top-notch. It's a little slow to start, but once it gets on track it's pretty suspenseful stuff. While, it maybe rated PG it still features some gooey and gross FX (moreso than ANY PG-13 movie of today and some R ones, as well!). Plus, the ending is fucking classic.







6. Halloween (2007)- Now, this is probably my most controversial entry in this countdown. Fans tend to either hate this one or love it. I fall in the later category. I think Zombie added an interesting take on the Myers mythos. Some may not like humanizing of him, but I think it was the right way to go. This way he does not retread territory that's been done before. When, he actually does get into remaking the original, he makes for a good time. The added more graphic violence fits the mold of this movie quite well. And, having Danielle Harris nude is nice, too! The less said of this movie's sequel, the better, though...





5. The Ring (2002)- This movie started the HORRIBLE trend of remake Japanese horror films as well cemented the annoyance of long, black-haired bitch-ghost movies. But, this one is actually that rarest of remakes, one that tops the original. I think the pacing is better here, as are the scares. It's also one of those few PG-13 horrors where the rating actually works. It's real creepy and scary, yet subtle. The lovely Ms. Watts is also a great lead in this movie. There are lots of memorable moments: the video itself, the horse, and the villainess coming out of the TV. But, once again, avoid the sequel at all costs!!!







4. Piranha 3D (2010)- If you though MBV3D was fun, then you ain't seen NOTHING yet!! Easily, THE best 3D experience, this wild, over the top remake tops the modest classic, it's based on. It's filled with blood rushing gore, black humor, cheese, a great cast, babes, and nudity. I like every single thing and frame from this movie. I am actually looking forward to the sequel to this one! The movie ripping it off/ cashing in on it (Shark Night 3D), eh, not so much...







3. The Blob (1988)- This long time favorite of mine simply blows the likable original out of the theater. It has some solid acting and spectacular gore FX. Shit, a kid even dies in it! Yet, it is never mean-spirited and always, always fun. It works in that Aliens sort of mode where action, sci-fi, and horror meld perfectly. Plus, Shawnee Smith looks sooo delicious in it! Cannot begin to tell you the crush I developed on her after this movie. It was a bomb when it came out, but due to fan and critic love, it when on the become a classic. An awesome movie all the way!!!







2. The Thing (1982)- John Carpenter's classic was also a bomb when it came out. But, since then this claustrophobic classic has been worshiped by fans all over the world. It would make for a perfect marathon with the aforementioned The Blob and Aliens. In fact, I think I need to do that one of these days!! Anyway, Bottin's FX are flawless, and Keith David and Kurt Russel are just awesome in it. So is the rest of the cast. That said the reremake coming out later this year seems positively uninteresting...





1. The Fly (1986)- David Cronenberg's masterpiece tops the list. It's always been my fav remake and will probably always be. Adding emotion and heart to the story and combining it with excellent acting and flawless FX make for a perfect film. The gore is gruesome and the score is classic. It also happens to be THE best beauty and the beast tale, since the original King Kong. Cronenberg's best movie is one that will always have a special place in my heart.









So, those are my choices. I really had to think about this one long and hard, but I soon found myself connecting with I ended up picking. Now, I'm curious. What are your thoughts on my list? What would have ranked?

You have read this article Halloween / horror films / House of Wax / I Spit On Your Grave / Invasion of the Body Snatchers / My Bloody Valentine 3D / Piranha 3D / remakes / The Blob / The Fly / The Ring / The Thing with the title Halloween. You can bookmark this page URL http://thestoryoc.blogspot.com/2011/08/the-10-best-horror-remakes-of-all-time.html. Thanks!

Duff's Peter Steele/ Halloween Honoring/ Celebration 2010

This Sunday marked my first time not going to Chiller in ages. In fact, I cannot remember the last I did not go there. For those of you readers and friends, who were there, I would love to hear how it was. I hope you guys who went there had a great time.

Anyways, I went to THE greatest bar on God's green Earth on Halloween night: Duff's Brooklyn!!!! I had decided to spend my Halloween there, and when I heard that they were doing something special to honor Peter Steele, the late lead signer of the legendary goth metal band Type O Negative, I had to go there. He passed away earlier this year.

Anyways, I first needed a costume and after much consideration I came up with: Zombie Guido!! He once known as the G-Man, and he was quite the ladies man. But, one night a certain cast member of the Jersey Shore wanted some, "Smoosh, smoosh", but our hero (who can do so much better) refused and got his throat slit. But, he rose from the grave in search of GTL (gym, tan, and laundry) and human flesh! Yeah, in other words I had way to much spare time to come up with this! :P

Anyways, as I got there, at first I thought I was the only person who had a costume, but soon others joined in/ appeared. Bar tender Laurie Ann, aka LA, grew an eight pack (better than a six pack!) for the event. There were lots of cool costumes, but I have to say that my fav was this dude who came in as Kiss guitarist Ace Frehley! That's just so fucking cool, man!

As is always the case with Duffs I ran into people I already knew and made new friends.

This being a night for Peter Steele, their were some noteworthy people there, too. His sister was there as was former porn star, ex-ECW star Jasmine St. Claire.

Now, this was not the big tribute to Steele; they originally mentioned it to be. They ain't ready for that yet, but they played his music most of the night, and we, his fans, remembered his greatness. I had been a fan since I was a teen and read about them in metal mags. When, I saw the cover to Bloody Kisses I had to get. It remains one of my fav albums. I had the pleasure ot meet him at the old Duff's some years back, and he was a funny, nice guy. As I said before, it was so sad when he passed away. I think my friend said ii beat when I saw her in Vegas in July, and she called them life changing music. Amen, sister, amen.

Anyways, I had a great time, and I hope you had a great Halloween, too. Remember it only comes once a year (though for some of us it's Halloween year round, but you get the idea), so hope you fuckin' enjoy it, the right way! And, if you wanna see more pics, go to my facebook. I got lots, there.

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Joanna Angel Talks Horror Movies on G4′s Attack of the Show

My newest blog for AltPornStar.com, has me talking about Joanna Angel and her appearance on AOTS this past Friday, as she discussed horror movies. It's all just in time for Halloween!!

Read it here: http://mastergio.altpornstar.com/2010/10/30/joanna-angel-talks-horror-movies-on-g4s-attack-of-the-show/

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Horror Viewings for October 2010

Like last last year, I wanna tell you what horror flicks I've watched this month, so far. Maybe it'll help you decide what to watch, or not watch, this month for your Halloween viewings. As always, I wanna know what you been watching, or what you think I/ others should be watching.

- I saw this one at the Big Apple Con with my friend Kristie. The lovely Diora Baird presented it, and I was very surprised with how good it turned out to be. It's a direct sequel to the original, but with a different cast playing the returning characters. Regardless, the acting is solid, and the movie is very exciting opting to go more in an action film vein. The gore is also quite awesome, and the attractive female cast make it all worth seeing.




- By and far the best of shaky cam horror, this intense horror movie is worth all the good things that have been said about. Strong acting and an ever increasing nail-biting sense of suspense and terror highlight this Spanish terror film, at it's very best. And, don't bother with the unneeded, lame American remake Quarantine.






A Serbian Film- This vile movie manages to shock and offend even me. Anyone who knows or reads this blog should that is no mean feet. Retired porn star is asked to make one more movie. But, said film features necrophilia, rape, incest, and, worst of all, pedophilia. The vile use of kids pushes this one to the limits of acceptability. Problem is that works only as a freak show and has no real redeem value to it. A hard film to sit through this is NOT for everyone. Only see it if you know what are getting yourself into and are sure you can deal with it. Not legally available in the US, you will have to opt for, "other" methods to see it.

- Watched it on my newly bought blu-ray. Gorezone review coming soon. When, it's up I'll post it here.









- Kick ass, gory slasher pays loving tribute to the stalk and slash films of yesteryear. Excellent splat FX and good acting help this one really stand on its own. The characters are likable, and you actually give a shit what happens to them! The killer, Chrome Skull, is fucking badass. And, the babes are really hot! A must see for fans of this kind of movie if you ain't done so yet. A sequel is being made by the movie's writer/ director, Robert Hall. It will feature porn babe and one of this blog's most beloved babes, Angelina Armani. Awesome fucking news in my book!



- A true classic. I talked about this one here before, so need to say anything else, other than I love it!







- Terrible Rosemary's Baby rip-off commits THE worst sin of all: it's fucking boring!!! Nothing happens in this shit eating waste of celluloid. Heather Graham looks beautiful (even knocked up), but even she don't make this shit worth sitting through.






- I rewatched the extended cut, my fav version of this classic. That's my fav version of this movie, by the way. My third most watched movie of all time. This fucker rules, but if your a true horror fan, then you already knew that!







- I saw this one last night. Is this better than the other two shitty American movies? I guess it is. But, by now means does this make it a good film. Still, there is worse shit out there. But, that's faint praise. On, the bright side it does have the beautiful Shawnee Smith in it. Also, the Japanese actress in it is GORGEOUS! Still, it reaches new levels of shitdom when the ending comes. Should you see this? Eh, probably not. But, hey at least it's better than Blessed....



Well, that's it for now. I hope you all have a safe and Happy Halloween!
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