Some Love for Jason on this Friday the 13th

Ahh, it's Friday the 13th, dear friends and readers! And, to me and many fans, it means that it's time to show some love for one of the greatest horror villains, ever, Jason Voorhees!

I've given tons of love for the series, in the past, including reviewing just about the whole franchise. But, this time I just wanna throw-out some random thoughts and love for it.

The first one I ever watched was Friday the 13th pt. VII: The New Blood, as a kid, on video. I fell in love with the series right then and there! Admit ably, the movie is sort of brain-dead, but it is fun. Plus, I developed a total crush on it's heroine Tina (Lar-Park Lincoln) and the bitchy Melissa (Susan Jennifer Sullivan). While, Lincoln did other films and TV and does cons, many wonder what has happened to Sullivan. Man, she was such a babe!

The best entry is still the original, which also happens to be one of the finest slasher movies, ever made. The ending is still totally killer after all these years. The worst? Easy. Jason Takes Manhattan, the eighth one in the series. But, it does have it's moments, including a dude who boxes Jason, a blonde babe who marks all her best parts for her teacher, Jason actually being in NYC, and the GORGEOUS Kelly Hu! It's still shit, though.
Jason's look always changed, but from the awesome Jason Lives (the 6th entry) and beyond, he was pretty much a zombie. The aforementioned New Blood had the best Jason look, while Jason Takes Manhattan had his lamest look. And, his lamest death! Death by toxic waste? What the fuck? So, we can beat him by sending him to a New Jersey dump?! =\ His best death scene? To me, it is his slide down the machete and the further chopping with it by Corey Feldman in the fourth entry, The Final Chapter.

The series has always had a it's share of hotties, both victims and heroines. Aside, from the aforementioned honies, who doesn't love Part 2's Kirsten Baker's ass or the 4th flick's twins? As far as final girls go, part five's Melanie Kinnamon is my all time favorite. She's so beautiful! Though, as far as spunkyness goes, Amy Steel from 2 is awesome! And, cute, too!

Finally, we all lover the kills and gore, don't we? Whether it's an ax to the face, arrow through the neck, sliced in half, bashed against a tree, frozen and shattered face, etc. We watch these movies for the gore, no doubt!

And, so today I say enjoy this day with your friend from Camp Crystal Lake!

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Hot Asian Girl of the Month: Kelly Hu

Just last night I saw the very enjoyable Batman: Under the Red Hood animated movie, and one of the excellent voice cast members is one of the most unquestionably beautiful women to ever walk on God's green Earth, this month's Hot Asian Girl: the truly perfect Kelly Hu!

The beautiful (does word even do her justice?) Ms. Hu was born on February 16, 1968, in Honolulu, Hawaii of Chinese, Filipino, and English decent making for a stunning and exotic mix. She she went to Pepperdine University in Malibu and currently lives in Brentwood, CA. This goddess has never been married. So, this gives us some sort of hope, right?!

She was Miss Teen Hawaii USA and in 1985 became Miss Teen USA. She has also long had an in interest in singing and dancing, as well as martial arts.

She did some TV shows like Melrose Place, 21 Jump Street, and Night Court. Her first movie role was in Friday the 13th pt. VII: Jason Takes Manhattan. Despite, her breathtaking beauty, this remains the worst entry in the series. Still, it has Hu's debut, baby!

She had two major roles on two TV shows in the form of Nash Bridges and Martial Law. I gotta say that it is through these two shows that I completely fell in love with this goddess!

It was around time that she began her first few appearances in mags like Stuff and Maxim further cemented her, in my mind, as one of the world's most beautiful women.

Here is a video from her Maxim shoot.


Speaking of the very fun Scorpion King, it was one of many big roles, she would get. In that film,she wore an outfit that was jaw dropping!!!!

She was also in Cradle to the Grave. That movie is just OK, but her presence is so distracting, I find it hard to pay attention to anything or anyone else in that movie. Not that you really need to think a lot when watching that... X2: X-Men United is her best film and, as Lady Deathstrike, one of her best roles!

She has continuously done movie and TV work (including the CW's The Vampire Dairies). One of my other fav roles that she did was in the fun horror flick Devil's Den. Sadly, I do catch her on some real crap, like Succubus: Hell Bent, but she always outshines even such things.

As I said at the beginning of this blog, she did the voice for the latest Batman animated movie. This is nothing new for Kelly, as she has done voice work on other toons like Robot Chicken, The Spectacular Spider-Man, and Afro-Samurai. Plus, she has also done voice work for video games like Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords and Terminator Salvation.

Aside from her large body of work, she is also very active for the democratic party. She is a member of CAUSE USA an organization that encourages Asian Americans to participate in the democratic process. She also campaigned for President Obama's run for the office. On top of that, she is an avid poker player. In fact, she frequently takes part in the World Series of Poker and World Poker Tour. Man, is there anything this babe cannot do?!

Here is a well done (well OK, I dislike the music, but I digress..) and much deserved tribute to her:


I know this blog covers a lot of beautiful women (particularly Asian women), but I truly believe that Kelly is one of the world's most stunning women. It is hard to believe that she is 42 years old, because she only gets more beautiful. She has one of the most beautiful faces I have ever seen, as well as the body of a goddess. I mean have you seen that flat stomach, sexy legs, and KILLER ass?!!!! She looks amazing kicking ass and her voice alone (as proven by her voice work) is sexy enough to drive me insane. To me, she is hugely underrated. She should be one of the biggest actresses, ever, as her beauty, talent, smarts, and personality outshine a million of Hollywood's interchangeable, idiotic celebs. Kelly Hu is not only August 2010's Hot Asian Girl of the Month, but one of the hottest of the women of all time.

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10 Awesome Gore Scenes, Vol. 1

Ahh, a good gore scene is always gonna make for a memorable moment in a movie, isn't it? This is a new, semi-regular post I am adding to this blog where I pick ten awesome gore scenes (duh!) and post them here.

Note that these films are in NO particular order whatsoever, nor are they meant to be. Whenever possible, I will post pics or the actual scene, if I can't get it, sorry. Go see the movie yourself to see it. Which, you really should regardless, of anything else.

WARNING: Spoilers are present. Anyways, sit back and enjoy the blood flow and carnage!

1. Friday the 13th (1980)- This is the best kill in the original, which remains one of the best slasher movies, ever made. A young Kevin Bacon gets an arrow through his neck after fucking some hottie and smoking weed. Oh yeah, this is the uncut version of that kill, which we finally got to see in the DVD released earlier this year.


2. Dawn of the Dead (1979)- Like the aforementioned Friday the 13th, this one has excellent FX work by Tom Savini. This scene where a dude opens up the door only to get his head blown off by a shotgun is one of the best exploding heads ever!

3. Ichi the Killer (2001) - One of the best movies from shock-master Takashi Miike this masterpiece has many gruesome moments, though the most shocking comes in the form of a women who has her nipples sliced off. It's a harrowing scene in a highly controversial classic.

4. Alien (1979)- Often ripped-off horror/ sci-fi movie has this often ripped off classic moment. One of the greatest gore scenes ever as a dude has a little alien come out of chest while eating. Fun times!


5. I Spit on Your Grave (1978)- Controversial rape-revenge film is one of the most disturbing movies I ever seen. This classic moment where a scumbag rapist gets his dick chopped off in the bath by the victim is one of the best and most unforgettable moments in the film. Not to mention utterly painful to watch!

6. A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)- Wes Craven's highly original creepy classic has some really great moments, but the best part has to be when a young Johnny Depp is killed in his bed and geyser of blood erupts! Messy!


7. Jaws (1975)- To me this is Spielberg's best film. Quint is my favorite character in the movie so it does suck when he dies, but he does die in a truly memorable and utterly vicious manner as the deadly great white chomps on the bottom half of his body.

8. The Devil's Rejects (2005)- Rob Zombie's modern classic is pretty fucking hard for a mainstream release and this scene where a pretty girl seemingly escapes the psychotic family only to get splattered by a truck is pretty fucked up!

9. Vampyres (1974)- This cult fav is the single best erotic-horror film ever made. This scene where our lovely, lesbian vamps share a victim's blood is both highly erotic and sexy, as well as bloody and violent! The ultimate mix of sex and violence!

10. Suspiria (1977)- Argento's best film has one of the best murder scenes ever, in the history of cinema as TWO pretty girls are killed in a vicious, jaw dropping scene accompanied by amazing music by the Goblins.


And, that's it for now! Tell me what you think of these picks and if there are any gore scenes you would like to see mentioned here, in the next volume.

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Spotlight on: FRIDAY THE 13TH

So this Friday the 13th marks the return of Jason Voorhees in the remake/ reboot/ reimagining/ rewhatever the fuck they are calling it of Friday the 13th. I will try to see it on Saturday, but I should remind you that this is made by the guy who did the Texas Chainsaw remake and that was mediocre. Still, I will try to give it a shot. That said, I am a huge fan of Jason and the Friday the 13th movies, and so, I give you mini-reviews of the whole entire series. As an added bonus, I pick my fav death from each film.

All reviews out of 4 stars.

- Years ago a couple were killed at Camp Crystal Lake, but they are gonna reopen it. Soon, one by one the teens at the camp begin to die horribly. Who is killing them?
This movie was a smash hit, upon it's release. And, while mainstream critics hated it, fans ate it up. Today considered a classic, it is often immediated never equaled. It is one of the best slasher movies, ever. It has tight, suspenseful directing by Sean Cunningham. The acting is good, and unlike the films that would follow it, the characters are likable. The FX work by Savini is amazing, and the ending is one of the best in any genre.
BEST DEATH: Kevin Bacon getting the arrow through his neck. Even cooler in the new unrated cut that recently hit DVD.
Rating: ****

- Having witnessed his mom lose her head in the first one Jason, now grown up, begins to kill some new victims.
In this one he wears a sack, not the hokey mask, but I think this is a creeper look for Jason. While the film is cliched, it is entertaining, and pretty Amy Steel is one of the best heroines in the series. The acting is really good, too, by all involved. Too bad, the MPAA BUTCHERED this film, and thus the violent murders end up lacking bite. Still, worth seeing, though.
BEST DEATH: The lovers getting impaled while fucking by our hero.
RATING: ***

- Taking place right after the last installment, Jason slaughters more kids. Oh, and get his infamous hokey mask! Score!
This one was originally released in 3-D and, finally Paramount has given us a a 3-D DVD! While, the movie takes some time to get started and some of the characters are sort of annoying, the 3-D FX rock. And, the climax is one of the best in the entire series. The girls are hot, too. In 3-D this is one of the best in the entire series. Without it, not so much...
BEST DEATH: Dude walks on his hands, and Jason hacks him from the crotch to his body. Fucking killer!
Rating (in 3-D): ***
in 2-D: **

- Jason is thought dead after the last one, but he escapes the morgue and kills more teens. But, a young horror fan aims to put an end to Jason's reign of terror.
One of the best and bloodiest entries in the series, this one introduced protagonist Tommy Jarvis (Corey Feldmen). It's a well directed movie, with some amazing splatter work by Savini. There is also a lot of HOT chicks in this one, including Kimberly Beck, as the lead, and the smoking hot twins. To top that off, the climax is exciting and Jason's death scene is his best in the whole series. Check out that slide down the machete! A kick ass gory slasher, that is of course, NOT the final chapter!
BEST DEATH: Aside form Jason's it has to be the pervert morgue worker who gets his throat slashed with a bone saw, then gets his head twisted! Nasty!
RATING: ***

- Tommy is older, now, and haunted by Jason. When, new murders begin to happen at the psychiatric ward, is it Jason or someone else?
Some hate this one cause it is not Jason that kills, but an imitator. But, give this one another look. Sure some of it is intentionally funny, but it is also really mean spirited and violent. Hacked by the MPAA, this one still hits well. It also has my fav of all the Friday heroines, in the form of the ravishing Melanie Kinnaman. She is a total babe!
BEST DEATH: The hottie with the nice rack, played by a babe whose actual name is, wait for it... Debi Sue Voorhees, getting her eyes cut with garden sheers! Fucking awesome and brutal!
RATING: ***

- Still haunted Tommy leaves the ward and heads to make sure Jason is dead. Thing is he reanimates him in the process. Doh! And, now we get the ever cool zombie Jason!
This is THE best sequel in the series. Directed and written with a great sense of humor, this is a fun, kick ass movie. The beginning is one of the best in any slasher film. Zombie Jason looks so fucking cool. Tommy Jarvis is a great foil to him, and Jennifer Cooke is one of the sexiest heroines in the series. There is also cool music by Alice Cooper. A truly nifty and fun movie experience, even with the pussy MPAA killing the gore.
BEST DEATH: Horshcak form Welcome Back, Kotter gets his heart ripped out by Jason!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
RATING: ***1/2

- Jason is back, but this time a beautiful babe, Tina (Lar Park Lincoln) with psychic powers battles him.
While sort of braindead, this is a fun movie that tries to add something new to the formula. Sadly, this is the most butchered film by the MPAA. The cool gore scenes are completely turned wimpy, due to lack of blood. Despite, that this movie holds a special place in my heart. Jason has never looked cooler, and Lincoln and Susan Jennifer Sullivan (as mega-bitch Melissa) are childhood crushes. On top of that the climax where Tina and Jason battle is fucking awesome. Plus, this is the movie where Kane Hodder took over the role of that Voorhees kid.
BEST DEATH: Pretty but mean Melissa gets an axe in her cute face thanks to our favorite zombie momma's boy.
RATING: **1/2

- After awakening from his watery grave he got from the last film, Jason hops on a boat that goes from Camp Crystal Lake to Manhattan, NY (huh?! how's that even possible?!)!
Without a shadow of a doubt the worst in the series, this movie is stupid and idiotic. It takes an hour for him to get to New York, and then he only spend ten minutes in Times Square! On top of that the movie is the most bloodless entry in the series. A truly pusssified version of our beloved slasher! The heroine is also the most annoying in the whole series! Even though one of the most beautiful women on God's green Earth, Kelly Hu, who has an early role in it, this film still blows. Shit, not even the naked blonde's body can save it!
BEST DEATH: One of the few cool moments has Jason battle a boxer and punch his head off!
RATING: *1/2

- Jason is back at Camp Crystal Lake, where he gets blown up. But, his evil cannot die, and he begins to possess people. This time though, there maybe a way to send him to hell, once and for all.
By now, we know, this did not kill him either! But, but to me the problem is the fact that this film blatantly rip-offs horror/ sci-fi/ action hybrid, The Hidden. That film is much better, but JGTH is not without merit. This is the bloodiest film in the series. The acting and FX are good, and there are enough pretty babes to please the eyes. An enjoyable, if flawed sequel.
BEST DEATH: The hot babe riding her boyfriend, who gets ripped in half by a spike and splatters all over her boyfriend. Gruesome, even more so in the unrated cut.
RATING: **1/2

- Taking place in the future (hence after the next installment, Freddy Vs. Jason), this one has Jason being cryonically frozen alone with a sexy government research, only to be awakened even more in the future, as in 2455! There he begins his next killing spree.
The best entry in a while, this one of the best sequels, period. There is some good acting, kick ass FX, amazing gore, great humor, and hot, hot babes! Kane is fucking awesome as Jason, and Lexa Doig is THE hottest heroine since Lar Park Lincoln. Jason's battle with sexy android Kay-EM 14 is a highlight, as is Ubber-Jason. A great time to be had, I simply love this one!
BEST DEATH: The super beautiful blonde who gets her face frozen, then smashed! So cool and innovative!
RATING: ***

- Taking place between JGTH and JX, Jason is still in hell, and so is Freddy (who died in Freddys Dead: The Final Nightmare). The kids in Elm Street no longer believe in him, so he uses Jason to make them fear him and regain his power. But, when these titans of terror clash who will win? And, who will survive?
It took years to finally mae this one. and it has it's flaws (why is Hodder not playing Jason?!), but it really is a fun movie. My second favorite sequel, this one has great effects and a KILLER climax. It is also exceptionally gory. The final battle between the two is worth the price of viewing it, alone.
BEST DEATH: Jason stabs a dude with his machete, then folds the bed breaking the guy in half. Impressive!
RATING: ***1/2

Enjoy this Friday the 13th. By the way, any of you going to see the remake? Tell me what you think of it. Oh, and beware of JASON VOORHEES!!!!!

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The Top 10 Horror Films of the '80s

The 80s were a huge time for horror. The success of the Halloween, Friday the 13th, and A Nightmare on Elm Street franchises saw an almost never ending batch of slasher films get released. Meanwhile, the birth of the VCR allowed more movies than ever to be accessible to viewers, many due to their graphic content could never play in theaters, expect for the most limited of releases, if it all. It also presented the genre with shit loads of controversy, as movies like I Spit on Your Grave, Maniac, Faces of Death, Silent Night, Deadly Night, etc spawned protests, outrage, and anger from critics, feminist group, and the right wing. Whatever the case maybe this is the era that sealed me as a horror fan for life, as by 1987, I was renting horror movies nonstop and reading Fangoria and Gorezone magazines.

10. - This is the greatest zombie film that is not Re-Animator or made by George Romero. Fulci's atmospheric mix of the supernatural and zombie films is his masterpiece. The gore set pieces are astounding, not the least of which is the little girl who gets the top of her head blown off. It also features two great leads in the beautiful Catorina MacCall and David Warbeck. Awesome stuff.

9. - This is the thinking man's zombie film, as Romero takes on the military and man being it's own worst enemy. The dialogue between the characters is classic. Rhodes (Joe Pilato) is a great villain, and, perhaps, worse than the zombies. He and his cronies' sexist words to Lori Caridelli's character (along with all the goings on in the movie) help seal this as the darkest entry in the series. But, beyond all of that DOTD also features THE best gore in Romero's movies, zombie or not. Savini's work is at top form, and the climax is completely and utterly jaw dropping. While, this film was dismissed upon it's initial release; it is now considered a classic. I have to say that I always liked this movie, and it has only gotten better with time. Oh, and Bub rules!

8. - While, this movie feels more like a remake of Sam Raimi's classic The Evil Dead, Raimi swears that it is a sequel, it's just Ash is so stupid he does the same exact thing twice (at least that is Raimi's explanation)! Regardless of what it is, Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn manages to top the amazing original. The mix of over-the-top gore and humor makes it one of the best "splatstick" films ever. It also insured that star Bruce Campbell would become a cult fav. Gotta love the whole, possessed chick gets her head stomped on, then has her eye sent flying into a pretty girl's screaming mouth! And, there is no denying the amazing camera work that Raimi incorporates in it. Regardless of one's feelings about crap like Spider-Man 3, Raimi will always be the guy who made the Evil Dead films!

7. - Cronenberg's biggest mainstream hit (up to this point) remains his best film, I think. The acting, writing, score, gore, heart, and amazing FX make this one perfect, in my book.

6. - Joe Dante's masterpiece is the single greatest werewolf film ever. Sure it spawned horrid sequels, but fuck e'm. Let's concentrate on this classic. The cast is amazing, as is Bottin's FX work. The first transformation scene is one of the finest moments in the genre. The love for the genre just drips from this movie. There are so many nods, winks, and tributes to the horror film, that it only makes it better in each viewing. And, what about the scene where the lovely Elizabeth Brooks gets it on with Christopher Stone and wolfs out? Or what about the classic ending? Or... well you get the idea!

5. - Sean Cunningham's classic may have gotten ripped by critics upon it's release, but the movie went on to make a shitload of money and spawn a total of ten sequels! It introduced horror villain, Jason Voorhees (but only as the freaky mongoloid in the water), and along with Carpenter's Halloween helped define the slasher film, i.e. they were ripped off a million times. But, the fact is this classic works where it others fail, because the characters are likable and well written. Also, the movie builds the suspense all the way till the exciting and violent climax. But, of course it is impossible to talk about this film and not mention Savini's astounding FX work. The gore, even though cut to get an R (by the way, fans rejoice, the movie is, along with the first two sequels coming uncut, finally, to DVD in February), is hard stuff, with the pretty girl getting the ax to her face, Jason's mommy losing her head in slo-mo, and most classic of all, Kevin Bacon getting an arrow through his neck, all shining as great moments in slasherdom.

4. - British writer Clive Barker had already made a name for himself with his sexually and violently explicit works of fiction, like his seminal Books of Blood, when he made the jump to write and direct this adaption of his novella The Hellbound Heart. One of the most exhilarating debuts by a director since The Evil Dead or Re-Animator, Hellraiser was gorgeous to look at and highly original in a genre where ripping off Friday the 13th, Gremlins, Jaws, etc was the norm. It gave us a new villain in Pinhead and the Cenobites, and featured some great acting from the cast, was sexy thanks to villainess Claire Higgins, gave us a horror goddess in the stunning Ashley Lawrence, and awashed in gore. The S&M images of the leather clad Cenobites and the whole hell is where pain and pleasure meet set it light years ahead of it's competition. The ending with villain Frank saying "Jesus wept", right before getting ripped apart by the hellish hooks is a classic horror moment.

3. - With slasher films already filled with Halloween and Friday the 13th wanna-bes, Wes Craven's defining masterpiece breathed new life into the slasher film. Surreal and scary Craven made the most of the low budget story of child-murderer Freddy Kruger who returns from the grave. The whole fact that he then invades teen's dreams, and if you die there you die in real life was wonderfully original. Freddy would go to become the single most popular horror villain of the era, followed very closely by Jason and Michael, but whereas the sequels, injected more humor in the films, the original has but a few one liners from Kruger. Mostly he is kept dark and scary. The FX work is stunning, moreso when one thinks of how little the film cost. Johnny Depp's classic death, where his bed shoots gallons of blood is yet, another defining moment in the genre. And, beyond of all that one of the genre's greatest, and prettiest, heroines was introduced in Nancy (Heather Langenkamp). In all one of the finest horror films, ever made.

2. - James Cameron had a tough job in front of him. He had to make a sequel to one of the most famous, influential, and downright scary sci-fi/ horror films ever made. But guess what? He succeed! Not only that but he totally blew away the original classic. Stan Winston's godlike work on the FX ranks as the best, EVER. The Alien Queen is one of the greatest monsters in film history. The pacing is adrenalinized and rip roaring, and the movie perfectly mixes action, science fiction, and horror. But, while it is a very gung-ho and exciting film; it also has a lot of heart. At, it's core is the story of this woman, left without a child, who now has this little girl she has to care for. It succeeds it making you care and does not turn into some wimpy mush. Of course, the movie does not forget nor abandon the horror genre. Witness the nail bitingly intense scene of Ripley (Sigorney Weaver) and Newt trapped in the room with the facehuggers, or absolutely amazing splatter moment, where good android Bishop (Lance Henrikson) gets ripped in half by the Queen (after impaling him in her tail) spraying white, milky robo-blood everywhere.

1. - This my absolute favorite film ever. I have been in love with this film since I saw it at about twelve years of age. Every single thing about this film is perfect. The characters are played by great actors, with Jeffery Combs and David Gale giving amazing performances. The script is fun, whitty, and funny, and very over-the-top. Babara Crampton, as Megan, is one of the most beautiful women to ever grace our beloved genre. Her scene where Dr. Hill (Gale) gives her head, with his decapitated head is truly one of horror's greatest and most infamous scenes. Despite the very low budget, the gore and zombie FX are fucking flawless. Stuart Gordon's debut adaption of H.P. Lovecraft short story is truly one of the most fucking kick ass movies ever made. Watch it, if you never have. Watch it again if you have!

You have read this article 1980s / A Nightmare on Elm Street / Aliens / Day of the Dead / Friday the 13th / Hellraiser / horror / horror films / Re-Animator / The Beyond / The Fly / The Howling / Top 10 Lists with the title Friday the 13th. You can bookmark this page URL http://thestoryoc.blogspot.com/2008/10/the-top-10-horror-films-of-the.html. Thanks!